Why would it be a struggle?

Every time I sat down at the computer, I perspired. What I have anything of value to write? Would what I wrote have any lasting value to anyone? How could I convey what was in my memory in a convincing way?

I wish my professor had provided me with an easy fill-in-the-blank/true-false/multiple-choice book for my autobiography. At the least, it would have been a great memory stimulator. And at the most, it would have provided me with a pretty complete personal history.

K.I.S.S. or Keep It Simple Stupid

If you’re like me, I’m sure you make things more difficult than they should be. Keeping it simple is especially true when trying to sort through the events of your life. Anything you can do to simplify this difficult autobiography-writing process will greatly increase the chances of finishing your work and leaving behind a worthwhile legacy.

Memorygrabber

Memorygrabber is the ideal tool to ease to writing pain.

Michael Boyter, a family history buff, created Memorygrabber as an improvement on other tools he had encountered over the years. All too often, the tools contained a question followed by pages of blank space for you to write your answer.

I can see why he would want to improve these tools; I would quickly grow bored and frustrated.

So here’s what I like about using Mr. Boyter’s Memorygrabber:

1. He uses many different methods to draw the memories out:
   • Complete the Sentence Exercises
   • Fill In The Blank Methodology
   • Mental “Walk-Throughs” - revisit places from your past: the home you grew up, your high school, your first home, your grandparents home.
   • A Quick-Response Questionnaire - A snapshot of your life right now.
   • Life Timeline Construction
   • A Daily Journal Template - get daily journal ideas and save time.
   • Self-Interview Formatted Questions
   • Online Resources Directory
   • List Creation Drills - favorite ways to relax, first experiences, etc.
2. He suggests different ways to capture your memories:
   • Journal
   • Photo albums
   • Software
   • Video and audio recording
3. He dispels all common excuses for getting started:
   • “I don’t know where to start!”
   • “I’m not a good writer!”
   • “I have nothing interesting to say!”
   • “I’m just a regular Joe. Autobiographies are for celebrities!”
4. Memorygrabber works great for yourself or for others: parents, grandparents, siblings, friends.

Have you ever just sat around the living room reliving memories with your family. I often find myself remembering things I had long since forgotten. Memorygrabber recreates the living room family discussion.

Experience has shown that it works great with parents, yourself, and even children. Even school age kids will enjoy recreating recent memories they have had in school. What a treasure it would be to have these memories stored safely away to be given to them at some time in the future.

Or can you imagine your kids asking what grandma and grandpa were like. Now you can pull out grandma and grandpa’s own memories and recollections.

Life is short. We never know when it’ll be our time. You’ve got interesting stories that your family for generations to come would like to hear or read about. Write your autobiography with Memorygrabber.

Here are some screenshots of some of the pages from Memorygrabber (click on them to enlarge):

You can either buy the full Memorygrabber ebook here: 2008 Memorygrabber.

OR

You can download a trial version here: Memorygrabber Trial Version.

Other ideas to get you started:

• How to Start an Autobiography
  
• Autobiography Characteristics
• Benjamin Franklin Autobiography: 7 Reasons He Wrote His Story - This article is especially helpful in determining your own reasons for writing your autobiography.
• If You Don’t Write Your Autobiography, Nobody Will!
• My List of Lists - For me, writing Life Lists has been a powerful memory stimulator.

]]> http://autobiographyworkshop.com/2008/04/04/memorygrabber-fill-in-the-blank-autobiography/feed/ http://autobiographyworkshop.com/2007/08/18/benjamin-franklin-autobiography-7-reasons-he-wrote-his-story/ http://autobiographyworkshop.com/2007/08/18/benjamin-franklin-autobiography-7-reasons-he-wrote-his-story/#comments Sat, 18 Aug 2007 13:56:24 +0000 Bob Brady http://autobiographyworkshop.com/?p=20 Much has been written about the Benjamin Franklin autobiography. With good reason, it stands as a stellar example of autobiography writing.

In fact, the autobiography of Ben Franklin is widely praised for both its contribution to literature and its historical value. Companies have been formed based on his teachings: FranklinCovey comes immediately to mind (remember the Franklin planner?).

Even in his greatness, Benjamin Franklin remained down to earth and approachable. Perhaps Benjamin Franklin’s simple approach to life is what makes his autobiography so readable and appreciated by millions of readers.

Luckily for us, he left an outline of why he wrote his life story. He doesn’t tell his story to show how marvelous he is. Instead, his reasons for writing show his humility.

He provided the following motives for jotting down his life’s history:

1. He’s always derived “Pleasure in obtaining any little Anecdote or my Ancestors.”

He likes finding stories about his own ancestors. He even notes that he often traveled to obtain these stories.

2. He “imagin[es] it may be equally agreable [sic] to you to know the Circumstances of my Life.”

Benjamin Franklin feels that others may derive some pleasure in reading his story.

3. “Having emerg’d from the Poverty and Obscurity in which I was born & bred, to a State of Affluence & some Degree of Reputation in the World, and having gone so far thro’ Life with a considerable Share of Felicity, the conducing Means I made use of, which, with the Blessing of God, so well succeeded, my Posterity may like to know, as they may find some of them suitable to their own Situations, & therefore fit to be imitated.”

He succeeded in his life. He wants others to know his rags-to-riches story.

4. “[T]he next Thing most like living one’s Life over again, seems to be a Recollection of that Life;”

If given the chance, Benjamin Franklin states that he would live his life over again. But since that is impossible, for him, the best thing is remembering his life.

5. He expresses his wish “to make that Recollection as durable as possible, the putting it down in Writing.”

It’s not good enough to keep the story in his mind. Or even to pass the story on in the oral tradition. He wants it to persist for generations.

6. “I shall indulge the Inclination so natural in old Men, to be talking of themselves and their own past Actions, and I shall indulge it… perhaps I shall a good deal gratify my own Vanity.”

Benjamin Franklin wants to talk about himself. It’s been said that people like talking about themselves: their accomplishments, their successes, their struggles, and their failures. Benjamin Franklin was no different.

7. Lastly, “I speak of thanking God, I desire with all Humility to acknowledge, that I owe the mention’d Happiness of my past Life to his kind Providence, which led me to the Means I us’d & gave them Success.”

He acknowledges God in his life. He attributes his success and happiness to God’s favor.

One can write an autobiography for any one of the reasons Benjamin Franklin mentions. He provides an excellent autobiography template.

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When I write about my own life, I invariably see areas in my life where I could improve. I remember a scripture that states that if you come unto God he will show you your weakness. I often feel the same when I approach my life. My weaknesses glaringly expose themselves to me.

My face still flushes when I recall certain events in my life. I still blush at various failures.

But what is it about failures, even past failures, that embarrasses me so much? Why do I find it difficult to confront failure?

The programming against failure starts early. “Make me proud,” our parents said. “You’ll do great!” “Don’t embarrass me!” “Don’t embarrass yourself!”

It continues as we go to school. Grades are based on successful execution of assigned tasks. Experimentation is discouraged. Even in Science class, where experimentation is supposedly encouraged, your final grade is determined by your ability to come to the right answer. But what if you discover something new in the process? No matter. You failed to get it right.

Additionally, failure extends beyond the boundaries of right or wrong answers in the classroom. Failure also includes failing to live up to expectations: rational or irrational. “I’m disappointed in you.”

Too often, success means living up to someone else’s definition of what it means to succeed. It seems that just about everyone has a definition of success. I’m not talking about a generalized definition here. I’m saying that people have predefined definitions for every area of their lives – whether they know it or not.

“If I make a million dollars next year, I will be successful.” “If I make $30,000 next year, I will be successful.”

“If I read a book this year, I will be successful.” “If I read 5 books this month, I will be successful.”

“If I can get up by 6 tomorrow morning, I will be successful.” “If I wake up tomorrow, I will be successful.”

The point is that we want to be successful. So much so, that we avoid, no we shun/evade/steer clear of/stay away from new opportunities if we perceive a chance of failure. Let me rephrase that, we dismiss growing chances because we’re too stinkin’ afraid.

Too stinkin’ afraid. It’s a shame, really.

Recently, I watched a paradigm shifting YouTube video about Sara Blakely, the founder of Spanx. Sara grew Spanx from $0 to a gazillion dollars. In the video (get the video here) she explains that every Sunday dinner, her dad would ask each of the children how they had failed in the previous week.

Again, he would ask how they had failed. Not how they succeeded. Completely different questions.

The question about succeeding encourages mediocrity. The children would be tempted to try only things at which they knew they could succeed.

The question about failure encourages breakthrough. The children will try things they have never tried before.

Have you failed at anything recently? I mean really failed.

I’m not suggesting that you say you’re going to try something new and then either purposely fail or fail to try.

I’m saying – Go and try something new. Give it your best shot. Give it your full attention. If at the end of the trial you have given it your all, then you have failed successfully.

There are infinite things at which to fail. What have you always wanted to try? Go out and try it. Now.

I have just finished writing three articles on helps for writing an autobiography: Getting Started, Autobiography Characteristics, and the importance of writing your autobiography.

I failed to mention the most important thing: to write.

Just start writing. That’s the most important thing.

Don’t get caught up on the mechanics. Those will come as you write.

Write.

But what should you write about?

Write about anything:

• The time you forgot your lines just before your cue in your theatrical debut.
• Your first boyfriend or girlfriend.
• Your favorite high school teacher.
• Your best friend.
• Your favorite ice cream flavor.
• The number of times you’ve been in the hospital.
• About your kids.
• Why you prefer Best Foods Mayonnaise to Kraft Mayonnaise.
• How you met your husband.
• What you do for a living.
• Your family vacations

Just start writing. Things will fall into place.

The prospect of writing, unfortunately, paralyzes most people. The way they teach writing in school, with a focus on rules, stifles creativity.

Of course, you have to have rules. Otherwise, all writing would be incoherent. But rules are meant to be broken. The truth is that most writers break rules consistently in their works.

Write as you speak. People often tell me that I write like I speak. This is a good thing because my personality can shine through.

Don’t worry about spelling things correctly. If you’re writing on the computer, the spelling checker will pick up most of your mistakes. If you’re writing in a journal or a piece of paper, just keep writing. If you’re writing ideas that you will transfer to an autobiography later, don’t fret over misspellings. You can catch them later.

At first, you’re just writing for you. Don’t pretend like someone is reading over your shoulder. You will feel inhibited and insecure. Don’t do it.

Writer after writer will tell you that you have to be willing to write a poor first draft. It’s true. The words will flow more freely. You can change things later.

If you’re planning on writing only one draft, who cares. Be you. Put yourself into it. Readers will forgive spelling and grammatical mistakes if they can sense honesty and personality in the writing. This is especially true in an autobiography or other personal writing.

If you go blank, make a list. (I touch more on this in a subsequent article.) Lists are magical.

Lists will give you ideas. Even as you start lists, thoughts will cascade like a waterfall. You won’t struggle for ideas.

Get started. Write now. You can do it.

The truth is that there are a lot of websites on how to start an autobiography. Many of them are great. Some are not so great. One really cool thing about trying to figure out how you want to present your autobiography is that there are many different ways to do it – many ways that I hadn’t even though of.

Here’s a list of some of the more exciting ones:

• Tape record your autobiography
• Organize your photo albums
• Keep a personal journal.
• Answer questions online and have your answers compiled into a nicely bound, hardcover book that can be passed on from generation to generation.
• Writing letters to family and friends to collect stories.
• Making a family tree.

Remember, It’s Your Story
The biggest thing to remember when starting your autobiography is that it’s your story. So the way you convey your story should reflect who you are. Be honest. Be honest in describing the experience. Be honest in describing how you felt about what happened.

The Easiest Way to Get Started
My absolute favorite way of autobiography starting is making lists.

That’s right making lists: memory lists, people lists, event lists, etc. This has got to be the simplest and least intimidating way to get started. As you start to make lists, you will notice that the ideas for what to write will come to your mind very quickly.

Your autobiography will come together as you in ways you couldn’t imagine as you build and expand lists.

Sample Autobiographies
And as far as an example of an autobiography…there are tons of these too. If you visit Wikipedia (a great online resource, by the way) you will find an over abundance of sample autobiographies for you to look at.

Take Your Time
Sometimes we think that we should be able to summarize our lives in quick half hour session. Once you know how to start an autobiography, you should allow your autobiography to develop over time. By slowing down, you’ll accomplish a number of things, including:

• Remembering more stories.
• Allowing others to contribute their stories of you.
• Making the whole task less intimidating as you take it one step at a time.
• Allowing for life’s lesson to reveal themselves to you.
• Ensuring that the autobiography you record reflects, accurately, the life that you’ve lived.

Starting an autobiography can be one of the most gratifying experiences. Writing an autobiography gives you a chance to reflect on your life. It gives you an opportunity to change the course of your life, if necessary.

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The number of ways of constructing an autobiography are about as diverse as the number of people who write them. However, there are some simple items that you can include in your autobiography that will make it both personal and meaningful to others.

1. Be Honest
Before you start writing, you need to decide to be honest. This sounds simple, but it’s amazing how easy it is to either embellish the description of events or inaccurately describe your feelings about a given event. Even leaving some things out can be a form of dishonesty. This means that you may have to address things in your autobiography that are painful or awkward for you to address.

2. Find Your Voice
This is a tough one. When I write, I sometimes choose vocabulary that doesn’t sound like me at all. It sounds overly stuffy or cold. It’s tempting to try and sound like someone else. Someone more educated. Or someone funnier. Or less funny. Or…Or…Or…

Don’t fall into the trap of wanting to sound like someone else. Just be yourself!

3. Your Why
You should have a why for writing your autobiography. In his famous autobiography, Benjamin Franklin included, as an introduction, a letter to his son. In the letter Mr. Franklin explains his Why for writing his story.

In his letter, he identified at least 11 reasons:
1. He enjoyed collecting stories about his ancestors. In fact, he sometimes traveled to find the stories he wanted.
2. He thinks that his son (and others) will enjoy reading his autobiography.
3. He wants to tell his rags-to-riches story.
4. He wants to explain how he succeeded and found happiness.
5. He wants to reflect on his life and decide on what he would change.
6. Next to reliving one’s life, recollecting one’s life is the best thing.
7. Make the autobiography “durable.” He wants it to persist.
8. He wants to indulge himself.
9. He wants to satisfy his vanity.
10. He wants to acknowledge the hand of God in his life.
11. He wants to explain that his success can be reversed.

Perhaps one of Benjamin Frankin’s reasons struck a nerve with you. If one did, use it. If not, be sure to find your Why. This is one of the most important of the autobiography characteristics. You’ll need it to work through the slow times.

4. Know Your Audience
While writing an autobiography can be a very personal experience, it’s important to know that unless you destroy your work, someone will probably read it someday. Know this. Think about what you want that person to know. For Benjamin Franklin, he addressed his son. But beyond his son, Benjamin Franklin looked to a much wider audience. And he succeeded. His autobiography is one of the most read autobiographies in the world.

Of course, your autobiography probably won’t be read by millions. But who will read it? Your children? Your grandchildren? Their children? Think about that.

5. Choose a Direction
How have the events in your life led you to where you are in life? Maybe your autobiography will demonstrate how your life was shaped. Or maybe you want your autobiography to just be a collection of stories. There are many directions to choose from - choose one!

Autobiography Characteristics Summarized:

1. Be Honest
2. Find Your Voice
3. Find Your Why
4. Know Your Audience
5. Choose a Direction

If you include these Autobiography Characteristics, you will write a successful autobiography, no matter what final form it takes.

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But the museum that left the most lasting impression on me was an
unassuming place called the Independence Living History Center.
Inside the main part of the museum, artifacts unearthed at National
Constitution were arranged on numerous tables for scientists to sift
through. These artifacts represented small clues into the lives of
everyday folks who lived during this great time in American history.

When I asked the guide what they were doing with all of these
relics, he said, “History books are written about people like
Benjamin Franklin or Thomas Jefferson. Nobody’s going to write a
book about us. So, we’re left to piece together the histories of
people like us.”

History reconstructed from garbage?

Do you know where a lot of these artifacts were found? They were
found in the colonists’ version of the trash. I don’t know about you,
but I’m sure that I don’t want my history to be reconstructed from
trash.

The truth…

Probably nobody will write a book about me…probably not about
you, either. I don’t like to think that two hundred years from now,
some historian will try to recreate a generalized concept of how I
lived based on a few dirty garbage items recovered at the local
landfill. Do you?

You and I Have a Story Worth Telling

If you’ve lived a life, you’ve created a story. A worthwhile story. A
story worth preserving. A story worth passing on.

Even with a story, the task of recording it frightens even the most
dedicated writer. It’s especially hard trying to do it on your own.

Don’t Be Frightened

Just start writing.

Ideas will come to you.

Believe me - the story you tell will be much more interesting than
the story conveyed by your garbage!

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It felt forced for a couple of reasons:

1. I don’t actually think that the high school play Bye Bye Birdie was a turning point for me.
2. I’m not sure that this is the direction I want to take the site.

Let me touch on each of these points.

First, I have had some pretty important turning points in my life. I mean life changing. Some of these were included in the previous post. I think I tried to hard, however. Maybe I thought that I should have more turning points. Maybe I just wanted more to write about.

Second, I thought that just braindumping my whole life onto paper (or the computer) would constitute an autobiography and would be fulfilling in itself. But just after a couple of stories, I’m beginning to think that I want some shape. I also need to reconsider my WHY of writing this darn thing.

I’m sure that I’ll want to write random stories:

Like the time I was going to let a trusted friend borrow Zelda for Nintendo. The trade was to take place at a service project. When we met at the designated place, he said that he couldn’t take it right away but that we should wrap it up and hide it in a place that only the two of us knew about. When we went to retrieve it later, surprise! it was gone.

Or the time,
My brother and I decided that sliding down a rope from our treehouse 10 feet up with only batting gloves protecting our hands would be a good idea. The rope burned right through the gloves.

Or the time,
We teepeed a couple of friends’ houses with more than 120 rolls of toilet papers.

There is so much richness in life. So many good stories. So many stories that should be told. Stupid stories. Funny stories. Life altering stories. Boring stories. Sad stories. Happy stories.

This site I am sure will evolve over time.

I hope to include, as I am here, hints about things that are working or not working for me. I also hope that people will include their own thoughts about what has worked in organizing their own life stories.

My dad has a always been a give-me-the-spotlight kind of guy. So, he always pushed me toward acting stuff; I took acting classes as a kid; I acted in elementary school and junior high school plays; I played in the lead in Church roadshows; I participated in a huge multi-church play.

When I got to high school, however, I figured that I would stop with that stuff. I wanted to fade into the woodwork. Of course, I still planned to perform well academically, but the extracurriculars would be set aside.

When I saw the audition poster for Bye Bye Birdie I knew I wouldn’t try out. I also knew that I wouldn’t tell anyone about it, especially my dad. I started to think in high school, that if I was going to do anything, I wanted it to be my decision and not at anyone else’s prodding.

Despite all of my stage experience, I was shy. (Still am.) I get anxious speaking in front of people: large or small audiences. Somehow, I’ve learned to suppress the flight compulsion. My face always turned bright red even when I tel a joke to a small group of friends. In spite of this, I always muster the courage to speak or act in front of others.

So I decided no more acting. But every stinkin’ time I passed one of the audition posters, my heart started thumping like I needed to do this.

Finally, the auditions came. I still wrestled with myself. Should I? Maybe… Nah… Yeah…

On a whim (without telling anyone), I walked in. I can’t remember if I had an audition piece or not but it was exhilarating. I loved standing on stage. My legs shook. My voice cracked.

In the end, Mrs. M. the drama teacher cast me as Harvey Johnson, the voice-cracking, nerdy, date-seeking, interrupter in the Telephone hour.

Every night on stage, my anxiety nearly overwhelmed me. I worried that I would forget the words, the choreography, or my cues.

I never did. And so my confidence grew.

Throughout high school and to this day, I have more confidence that I can accomplish things in spite of my fear.

My Turning Points

1. My first high school play
2. Car accident
3. LDS Mission
4. Getting married
5. Dropping out of college
6. Having kids
7. Jumping out of Corporate America.
8. Going back to school.

The list seems short but it represents the perspective changing events of my life.